At first I didn’t intend to update until I was completely satisfied with my site, but after some consideration I’ve decided to scrap that and start making posts. Eventually I will get around to making everything look better, but as long as people can read and comment on my posts, there’s no real reason to hold back on posting. That and there’s been some stuff I’ve wanted to write about that I’m too impatient to hold off on.
Before I get to that (subsequent posts), I might as well go over my intentions for this site.
Many years back (we’re talking late 90s) I started a blog because I was starved for attention and it was what people I knew online were doing. I thought if I did it too, maybe people would understand me better and allow me to become closer with them. I was desperate to be liked.
It’s not uncommon for kids/teens to be like that, but I think the difference with me was that I was already facing issues of feeling isolated due to various circumstances in my life (bullying, depression, living in a rural area, etc) Due to those things, I feel I was even more desperate for some kind of popularity than your average teen.
You might expect that as I’m speaking of the past that things are different now, but in all honesty, I’m not so sure. It’s true that unlike back then I recognize that my efforts were mostly attention seeking, but that doesn’t mean I have somehow transcended above that. I would still like the blog to help people understand me better and for it to bring me closer with people. I still would like attention. The only thing that’s really changed is my desperation for it has decreased a couple magnitudes
That’s okay with me though. I honestly believe that it’s normal to want attention, and accepting it is the first step towards cultivating proper behaviors for receiving it. Denying it would only create problems down the line as you engage in rash behaviors that you wont fully understand (from my observations)
With that aside, let’s get down to some business. Posts will pretty much be when I feel like them (one a month at the least and maybe 4-5 at the most) I will not be advertising them at first (as I’ve taken a break from social media) but when I do inevitably return to it, I will most likely only advertise a few of the ones that I feel are good representations of my content.
(In other words, the best way to keep up to date with all the posts is to just keep checking)
That’s all I’ve really got to say for now. Any questions are welcome in the comments (common sense rules apply)